What do you wish you would have known?

I grew up as the oldest of three kids and truth be told, I was....spoiled.  And not just spoiled or well taken care of, but a brat- a big fat spoiled brat.  I had nearly any and everything that I ever wanted.  If I didnt, you would be hearing about it.  In my teenage years, my parents attempted to reign me in, but the damage was done.  I got what I wanted, when I wanted it- and I thought that was how life was. 

I went away to college, it didnt change.  I was a brat in college.  I was a brat to my room mates and especially my mother.  I worked and always had, but if you thought that taught me any sort of lesson about budgeting, living within my means or gratitude, you are wrong.  Whenever I got into trouble, my loving, easily manipulated mother came to my rescue.  It was really awesome to be me.

So, at the age of 23, my mother passes away and I find myself alone.  No parents to support me or bail me out.  In fact, I now had a 12 year old to take care of.  What the heck??  How was this possible and how the heck was I going to make it?  Did this change my attitude?  Nope.

Josh and I had been dating and I never had expected him to take care of me.  I wasnt comfortable with him seeing me in that kind of light.  We chose to get married a couple of years later, had a daughter, adopted a Katy, bought a house, even had a puppy.  Did my attitude change?  Well, kind of.  I still wanted what I wanted when I wanted it- and thus became the cavern of credit cards and lies to cover up.  It wreaked havoc on my marriage. It wasn't just about the money.  It was the general attitude of overwhelming brattiness.  (yes, that's a word)

Well, cut to six years of marriage, going through rehab for addiction and counseling for a year.  What did I learn?  Its not all about me.  Its not all about what I want and how I feel.  I get to take a step back and ask myself if what I want is best for both me and those around me.  What a revelation.  I wish I would have known this much earlier in life.  Here is the funny thing though, when people told me that in my younger years, I laughed at them.  How DARE they not know that it's all about me, all the time?!  Don't they know who I am?! 

The funny thing was, I didn't know who I was, so how in the world would I expect others to know?  The greatest lesson I have been able to take away from this is how I am going to raise my kids.  I work to instill a sense of self worth so that they aren't looking for a Barbie or a new sweater to define them.  I work to instill a greater sense of self.  I also work with them on things like budgeting.  I literally had NO idea how to do it and actually live by it until I was 30!  So what do you wish you would have known?  What lesson was lost on you?  (I actually have a laundry list if anyone is interested)  What do you strive to instill in the next generation?