What???? Im fat??? No way!!!

OK, the title is a little melodramatic- I know.  I went in for my post op appointment last week after a LONG seven week recovery basically in bed.  Guess what?!  I gained weight over the holidays?!  Shocker.  The awesome thing is when your doctor tells you like you don't already know.  Like I don't have a mirror, or a scale, or eyes, or hands, or a brain.  Nope- when you tell me that I am overweight- I'm SHOCKED!  OK, sarcasm aside- I get that its her job to keep me in good health and that my weight is a BIG part of that.  Not just weight but overall health.  Since having Lyza, I have had some down right debilitating pain issues that despite the dr.s best efforts- still plague me daily.  SO, in the world of Kristen, when it hurts, I don't do it.  I know, I know...if I did it, it would hurt less....blah, blah, blah.  Anyway- when I don't work out I pay less and less attention to what I am shoving in my face.  Nachos?  SURE!  Cheese its?  WHY NOT!  French fries?  DON'T MIND IF I DO!  I'm a salty carb person with a very occasional sweet tooth.  I just like carbs, lets be real.

Well- my friends- thing are about to get real.  This gal in front of you- well, behind the computer screen, has gained an astounding 25 lbs in the last 28 months.  Yup- that's almost a pound a month.  Besides the fact that I had to buy new jeans, I feel crappy.  Seriously- I'm wiped ALL the time.  My body just feels- ick- for the lack of a better term.  I have been documentary-ing it up lately and combined with the fact that my super model doctor called me fat- I decided- IT IS TIME.  Keep in mind- I have to get on hormones coming up here pretty soon and I am not sure what this will do to my body.  Im thinking it should help rather than hinder- right?!  I don't know, never been on them before.....

SO- I have seen all the same infomercials as the rest of you.  Insanity, P90X, Yoga booty ballet (my personal favorite name), and I am sure that you have sat through a couple of them like I undeniably have.  SO- I started thinking.  Most of these programs are expensive and honestly mama cant swing it right now.  Besides instructional work out, they are selling inspiration.  If someone else can do this workout EVERY DAY for 90 days- surely I can too!  Right?!  Right.  SO- Super queen of excuses said to myself- why not?  I can do anything for 90 days!  Dude- I was PREGNANT for 933 days.  (yes, I calculated that stuff out) 90 days is NOTHING and I wont even puke! (hopefully)

So here we are!  I started it all today-sick with a cold and all.  I measured, weighed and took PICTURES showing all 360 degrees of my fluffy goodness.  YUP!  I wrote it all down and kept track of EVERYTHING that went into my mouth- including the 7 bites of frosting-less birthday cake.  I tracked it all on sparkpeople.com and totaled up all the nutrition going into my body.  Guess what?  I was "good" today and I had a realization that I am constantly eating but nutritionally starving myself.  No wonder my vitamin D was so low they almost didn't accept me for live saving surgery?!

SO- I went where all people should start on their adventures of health- the grocery store!  Ta-da!  I decided that it was time.  Time I give up all of the processed yummy guilty pleasures that I have accustomed myself to.  I bought myself an entire weeks worth of groceries without leaving the perimeter of the store!  99% was fruits and veggies- the others was eggs, low fat milk alternative (lactose intolerance), dried beans and frozen veggies.  I am basically going vegetarian   I don't know of any fat, unhealthy people who live on fruits and veggies- do you?  Is it sustainable?  I don't know, I have never tried it.  SO- what the hell- let's try it!

In addition- my behind is getting out of this computer chair and I'm doing two things 6 days a week.  I am walking/jogging (once I work back up to it) for a minimum of 30 minutes a day and then doing 3 intervals of benderfitness.com workouts everyday.  I have a console that I can you tube in my living room so I can do it in the privacy of my own living room for FREE.  Most of her strength training workouts are about 10-15 minutes and though they are short- they will KICK YOUR BUTT.  Seriously- 5 minutes into my first set I was praying to a higher power.  True story.  Anyway- I thought that I would put this very personal adventure out there in mass and see who else wants to play?  Its 90 days!  I dated the most really terrible guys in my life for longer than that- so I can definitely work on my health for that long.  What I am HOPING is that I love my body, health and way of life after 90 days and I cant imagine going back to microwave burritos and tater tots.  Who knows though?  I cant tell where my life will be in 90 days, but here's to having fun in the mean time!!  Let's play!!

Familia...

Wow, this has been one amazing day.  I think its so easy to forget the miracle of a child's birth.  Especially when you are younger and every single person around you seems to be pregnant and having kids.  Katy's fathers had a daughter this morning.  Her name is Charlotte.  She is the most perfect angel in the world.  I am   so overwhelmed with love today.

Family has been a crazy and evolving thing for me.  I was raised with a brother, sister, and a mom and dad.  I was adopted and always knew that I had another side of my family but was sure that I would never reconnect.  On the other hand, we knew Katy's birth family quite well.  Hers was an open adoption and I was pretty sure that she would reconnect with them once again.  As we all know now, my birth family has been a part of my life for going on a year now.  Katy's birth family has been part of our family again for close to three years and for being orphaned little girls, we have so much family that writing a Christmas card list is a huge feat now.

In the years between our mothers passing and Katy and I reconnecting with our birth families something truly amazing happened.  I became the mother.  I became the matriarch of our family unit in a way that I couldn't have imagined even possible.  I had a tricky time being both mother and sister to Katy but we navigated it together and with love.  I also had an amazing chosen family- friends who are still so much more than friends.  They truly are the most amazing friends and loved ones that have been there through the good times and the bad.  They were there for support and hugs and to laugh and celebrate with.  I had the experience of seeing that just because the parents that raised me were gone, I wasn't alone.  I was surrounded with love.  I was surrounded by people who care.

I really love that there is no such thing as a "normal" family.  There are so many different ways to become and have a family.  The one true constant is love.  I feel so blessed to have the unusual but amazing family that I have.  I feel so lucky to have so much more than I ever dreamed.  With love, anything is possible.  Welcome to the world, into the family and into our hearts baby Charlotte.
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2012 Highlights

So social media keeps us all connected but sometimes I think that it breeds social melt down.  I get overwhelmed by the amount of information that is placed out there regarding other peoples lives.  Every high, low, touchdown, meltdown gets documented in a very public forum.  On top of that, I see so many people wanting to say good riddance to 2012 and saying how its been the worst 12 months of their lives and honestly it makes me sad.  There are highs and lows in everyone's day to day lives.  I think that its important to remember the awesome events and blessings.  It makes the crappy times a little easier to digest.  Here are a few of the great things that happened to the Parsons family in the year 2012! (and yes I know that you probably already know most of these things but I'm recording them more for me to remember than for others to be informed) :)

February my birth family and I reconnected.  My Mom found me and it has been documented in greater detail in previous blog posts.  We have had some pretty amazing highs, so pretty emotional learning experiences and most of all, we are just- us.  A regular family that has fun together and plenty of quirks.  There is no such thing as a perfect family but we are perfectly us.  I'm so grateful for each and every one of them in my life.  

Josh and I also celebrated our seven year wedding anniversary.  I know that may not seem like something to be documented but I think people sometimes forget that marriage is dang hard sometimes.  Josh and I have gone through some pretty amazing learning and growth periods over the last ten years that we have been together.  There were times I wasn't sure if we would make it another day, let along another year.  So I must say that our seven year anniversary was a pretty monumental and awesome mark.

I had the opportunity to fly to Denver in June with Lyza and spend a week with my birth family.  It was pretty amazing.  We had such a great time just being a family.  Lyza got to see her cousins and spend time bonding with her Aunts, Uncles, Nana and Papa.  My Mom did a big BBQ to introduce me to Aunts, Uncles, cousins, Grandparents- it was pretty cool.  And we had snow cones to boot!  It was an action packed week but it was so much fun.  

Katy made the decision to serve a full time mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  I went from shock, to fear, to more fear, to excitement and joy.  My baby sister has not had the most conventional life and upbringing by any stretch of the imagination.  She has had challenges in her 21 years that most grown adults haven't endured.  And somehow, by the grace of God, she endures to be one of the most amazing people that I know.  Her decision to serve a mission was a pretty amazing period of growth and bonding for she and I.  I am so proud of her and I know that this is exactly where she should be in her life.  I miss her so much but I am confident that she is doing exactly what she needs to be doing at this point in her life.  I love her to the moon and back and I hope she feels my love with her daily.

Her farewell was one of the most hectic and amazing events of the year for me.  We had both our Richardson and Macdonald families, Katy's birth family which included both the Heder and Stong sides, and my birth family -the Holmans.  There were over 200 people present and it was filled with laughter and love.  We got to introduce all the different sides of our families to one another.  The abundance of love was seriously overwhelming.  I was able to see members of the Heder family that I never imagined I would see again let alone hug and have back in my life.  I felt my Mom and Dad close to us that day and knew that they were instrumental in all of our families reconnecting.  

Lyza turned one and Sophia turned seven in September.  I cant believe how quickly time is passing and how grown up my little girls are!  Lyza continues to be the happiest and sweetest baby girl imaginable.  She is walking, talking and all around just as happy as can be.  She continues to be a constant source of sunshine and giggles in our home.  Sophia is one of the most tender, loving individuals that I know.  I know she is only seven but the depths that she is able to love is pretty amazing to me.  We celebrated their birthdays with a huge family blowout!  My family traveled into town from Denver and my friends and family from all around joined us to celebrate.  We topped the weekend off with Lyza being blessed and given a name in the Church.  My Dad Raymond did the honors and it is one of the best moments of the year for me.  

I turned 32 in October!  Woo hoo!  Another year older, and I can actually say- another year wiser.  I continue to strive to have peace and serenity in my life.  It was pretty amazing to have my Mom Lynn fly into town to celebrate with me.  She was there for the first one and there for this one.  Pretty cool huh?  It wasn't anything grand or outlandish but it was simple and full of love.  I am proud to say that I am in my 30's and I can honestly say that I am more fulfilled and happier than I have ever been in my life.  Life is pretty amazing.  

In November we made the 10 hour trek with three kids in tow to Denver for Thanksgiving.  Driving aside, it was pretty freaking cool.  We got to hang out with the fam, eat good food, let the grand kids play together non stop- its was awesome.  We went to the Denver Children's Museum and it was so cool to see the five of them running around, exploring, learning and having fun together.  Gavin did a great job being snuggled and staying happy.  

Christmas was small but perfect this year.  As usual life happened and the money that was saved for Christmas was forcibly spent elsewhere right before the season began.  So we got creative and kept gift to really thoughtful and mindful tokens rather than just grabbing things at Target for the sake of opening a gift.  It was so much fun to see the excitement and joy on the kids faces.  The best gifts were the ones that the kids picked out for each other- even though they were from the dollar store.  They knew EXACTLY what they wanted to get their siblings and what they thought would make the other happy.  It was so sweet to see both of them get excited to see the others reactions.  They really understood the gift of giving.

The day after Christmas was Duncan's fifth birthday.  Even though it was small- he did exactly what he wanted.  He went to Walmart and picked out what he wanted which was a bike helmet, a horn for his bike, a puzzle and a stuffed Darth Vader with a Santa hat.  It was so perfectly Duncan.  He is starting to realize that school is approaching and that more independence is coming his way.  He is mommy's boy and he is nervous to be away but I have faith that school with be amazing for him.

And to round out the highlights of 2012.  On December 27th, I was declared cancer free.  I had a whirlwind of a month from November 26th all the way to December 27th.  I was having pain and problems and went in for about 1000 tests and I was diagnosed with ovarian and uteran cancer.  I had surgery 15 days later and on the 27th of December I had my pathology results come back as 100% cancer free and I got a clean bill of health!  I am so blessed that I had a wonderful team of doctors who were skillful and knew what the best plan of action was.  I also feel so blessed that everything was resolved with ONE surgery  and that I didn't have to endure further treatment. I am grateful for my health in a very unique way right now.  

Phew, so there are all the blessings that 2012 had for the Parsons family.  It was a pretty adventurous year and one that I will never forget.  I feel the abundance of love surrounding me and I hope that you feel it too.  May 2013 bring us all new adventures and growth!